Wednesday, October 04, 2006


(For those of you that have me in your bloglines, thank you. But, I apologize to you for my post appearing so many times. Blogger is on the blink! Big shocker!)

We all do it, don't we? Some of us worry about bills, worry about our kids, worry about our husbands, worry about our health, worry about things that we cannot control. Then, we worry about how we look, what we said, what we did, what we are going to do. We constantly second guess ourselves as women! I know I am using the word WE a lot but it's true, WE ALL DO THIS! No one has a magic potion that keeps them free of worry or self doubt. There is no magic age we someday reach that completely frees us! That is why we can all learn from each other. I really frown upon comments like, "Well, I am much older than you." Or "When you get to be my age you will quit caring what everyone else thinks!" Bologna! Not possible! I do think as women get older, we understand who we are a little more. While I don't look down at someone being twenty-five years old, I do know that I have changed so much since that age. In fact, I wouldn't want to go back to that age for even a day. And women that are now thirty-five years old and past the age of thirty (I am thirty), probably have a much clearer picture of some things than I do. They are probably a tad more comfortable in their own skin at thirty-five then they were at thirty. That's the gift of age! But, it turns into bologna when someone thinks they will have it all together when they reach a certain age, especially when they try to portray that to everyone. We all have different timelines, different stories to tell, different journeys to travel, so that makes us ALL extremely valuable women.

Each of us lay our heads on different pillows each night. The pillow is truly what defines us. The pillow is where it all comes to surface. Whatever is bothering us, whatever we are worried about, whatever we are struggling with, whatever we are happy about, it all goes down on the pillow. When I see a beautiful woman, with her beautiful children, get into her beautiful SUV to drive home to her beautiful home, I may be tempted to look at her as someone that has it all together. But the truth is, she has a pillow too. Her pillow may be full of self doubt, fear, worry, insecurity, jealousy and so much more. In fact, I know that no matter how beautiful she seems or how perfect her life appears, her pillow has a story to tell. You see, no one is exempt. No one is free from self doubt, no one is free of struggles.

I read an email this morning that said something that really struck a chord with me. "I am just trying to learn how to be okay with me." Well, aren't we all? Oprah would not be making the money she makes if it weren't for a world full of people trying to be OKAY. So why is it that we want everyone to think we are okay? Why do we want others to think our lives are perfect? Why do we want others to think we have beaten struggles, never to deal with them again? Women do this! It drives me insane! It's something I can see coming from miles away. I recognize it so quickly because I do the same exact thing. But, I try really hard not to. Here's the deal. God cannot use someone trying to be perfect. He can't! He won't! We were created to be ourselves and when we can't be honest with those around us or even honest with ourselves, we are useless. It's a harsh reality but it's true. Useless!

Imagine attending a Bible Study with women where everyone walks in wearing no makeup, no jewelry, no cute shoes, cute clothes, or anything else used to accessorize like we do! Instead you are told that the only thing you can wear is sweats and socks. And it can't be cute hooded sweats with flared legs. I am talking old fashion Hanes sweats and Hanes socks! That's it! Your hair isn't fixed, your makeup isn't on, it's just YOU. Then you are told that you can't talk about all the things you do. You can't talk about how YOU homeschool your children or how YOU sing at church or how YOU scrapbook or how YOU are the best cook ever born or how YOU have the best marriage in the whole world. The only thing you can talk about is your guts. You know, the stuff you don't want anyone to know about! Can you see it? Can you just imagine for one moment what that would look like? I know it would be hard for me. I love fashion, I love having funky hair, I love letting everyone know what I can do and I have some pretty bad acne scars that I cover up with makeup. My pores are big, and I look like I have no eyelashes because they are so blonde. I would feel pretty plain on the outside. How about you?

But that is who I really am! Underneath the cute clothes, the hair, the makeup, the shoes, the accessories, there is something! There is something more. My pain, my journey, my struggles, my flaws, that is who I am. THOSE are my pearls! And if we could all embrace THIS, we could all learn a lot from one another. Forget pride, forget everyone thinking you have it all together because we all know you don't! Some of us have experienced victory in areas that others haven't, some of us have conquered things through age, but no matter what, we ALL have things we have to work on daily.

Don't be so afraid to be YOU. Don't be so afraid to take that makeup off and show the world who you really are. Be who God created you to be!

He created us for something! Something pretty amazing, something pretty awesome! It's for something! Do you know what?? I do! And I am going to share it for the next couple of days! God has been showing me some pretty amazing stuff that I know is going to speak to some of you. Thanks for reading my sermonette, I am honored to have so many incredible women in my life through this blog. You bless me so much!

God is up to SOMETHING!!


Dee said...

Wow - as usual Amanda, you leave me saying, "Go Girl - Preach it!!!!" and of course, wanting more. You are so right - we all struggle with needed to be accepted, but I think sometimes in order to be accepted, we BELIEVE that we must change who we are. I know I use to but as I've gotten older, I have realized that I can only be ME - now - do I worry about things, well yeah, sometimes I do (think, my email - LOL)but the most wonderful thing (I think) is being aware of it. That is key - knowing that you are worrying allows you to be aware enough to GIVE IT TO GOD!!!! :)

Ok - so what I started to say was - I can't wait to see what else you have to say!!! Bring it on...

I love you girl!

Munchkin Land said...

I just posted something similar to this very subject on my blog. I'm currently taking heart in Psalm 139:14. I am fearfully and wonderfully made!!! I love that we're all created with different strengths, different desires, and different talents. Life would be so boring otherwise...

Wendy said...

Great post! Usually when I am worrying it is due to my lack of trusting God or trusting what He has said in His word are true. When I find myself worrying about everything I have to think about why, but it is hard sometimes.

I agree w/you about the age thing. Just because someone is older does not necessarily mean they are wiser. They will have had more days, but what they have done with the time that has given to them would determine if they are really wiser or not.

Kelly said...

I just love your blogs!
I adore my home and family (as you so obviously do!) and you just sound like you are right where God planned for you to be ~ the heart of your home!
Your words are so honest and from your heart ~ I feel like you and I would be friends if we were neighbors!

Anyway... I identified with your post a few days ago about church and friendships and the struggle you have been facing. We have been in a similar situation for the past year and I still fight the feelings of resentment and bitterness for lost friendships (that I am now realizing were probably never real friendships to begin with). I appreciate your transparency with your feelings as I have felt (and feel!) them too, and tend to think I am the only one. Thank you for sharing from your heart!

Anonymous said...

Thank you....You can only carry around the pain from your journey for so long before it begins to overcome and overwhelm you. Kind of funny how you can know this, and teach it, but are afraid that it might not apply to you. I'm working hard on it and can't wait to see what you have to say next.


Life full of blessings said...

HI Amanda,
Thanks for this shared from your heart and I love that about you!
God has used you in my life.
Love ya,

Paula said...

Here is an idea, move to Tennessee so we can be the best of friends and our kids can grow up together and we can wear our Hanes sweat pants with no make up and cook and chat all day!!!!
Seriously, we have a family member that is LOADED. The HUGE house (without and payment), SUV (without a payment) and it all looks good from the outside looking in. But Chris and I would NEVER trade our life for theirs. The true love we have for their money would not be worth it because they are NOT happy. They have many marriage problems and we don't. We may struggle from time to time with money, but I would still NEVER trade places. God made each of us for our unique purpose and wanting to be in someone elses shoes doesn't serve God's purpose. The goal should be "be comfortable in your our skin, embrace the gifts God gave you and learn who He made you to be."

Kellie said...

Great. I can't waite for the Word from HIM. I love to see how HE uses us.

Stacey said...

You spoke my heart.
Thank you.
You inspure me yet again.

Thanks for your visits lately! I am lovin' getting to know you girlfriend!!

HeiressChild said...

powerful words.