(I am having major blogger issues. So if I am on your bloglines and my post shows up MANY times. Sorry! It's bloggers fault!)
A couple of months ago I really began to pray about my relationships/friendships . There are those that I talked to on the phone but never really see. Those that I strictly email because we can never find the time to meet up. Then there are my close friends that make time to see me and I make time to see them. These type of friends are on the front row of my life and we have a foundation and history that makes our friendship so special. I truly trust the people on the front row. Recently I have become friends with a few bloggers. We have talked on the phone, read the Bible together, prayed for one another and chatted daily on email. These women/bloggers live too far away to meet. Maybe someday it will happen but for now our friendship is limited to email and phone calls. As I prayed about all of these relationships, from friends to friend bloggers to just acquaintances, I asked God for something very specific. I asked for clarity. I prayed that God would show me those that I needed to truly invest in. I asked Him to show me those that I can trust and those that I know will always be true to me. That is hard to find.
Several years ago it was very hard for me to grasp that people sometimes are in our lives for only a season. Just recently I had a conversation with a friend that was in my Wedding and I was in hers. We email each other all the time but we never really see each other. I have kids, she doesn't. I stay at home, she works an amazing job that allows her to travel the world. Also we live almost an hour away from each other. Our priorities are different, our friends are different, there is not very much we have in common anymore. During our conversation, we actually talked about this. But I know that if I needed her, she would be there. I know that when baby Ezekiel is born, she will be there. She is always there for the important things. We may not meet for dinner or talk on the phone as much as we would like but we trust our relationship and we know that even though time passes, we still love each other very much. There was a season where we met for dinner on Friday nights and then went country dancing with all of our single friends. We talked all the time and spent many weekends hanging out. In High School we would chat in the hall and giggle about silly things. We have history, we have a foundation so I am okay with our season of non-stop communication being over. She will always be a part of my life.
I used to meet people, have a connection and give my heart away. I longed to be a friend and to have a friend. But it's funny how I have changed. Actually I love the fact that I am changing in this way. I don't have to have a ton of friends! I don't want to hang out with everyone I talk to on the phone or everyone I email. Some relationships are meant just for that. When I spend time with other women and I feel like maybe this could be a potential friendship, I have started really praying. I ask God for an extra amount of discernment when choosing friends. He knows what I need and He knows what the other person needs. And this I can really rest in because I know He will protect me. Some may think this sounds a bit extreme but I haven't guarded my heart in the past so I have to be careful when choosing friends. We all do. When I truly seek Him in my friendships, it works. I don't feel like I do all the calling or I am the one always making the plans. My feelings are not constantly getting hurt and I am not wondering whether or not this person is being true/loyal to me. I know. Friends will always mess up, friends will hurt us, shock us and behave badly. But the difference is, you know their heart and you always give them the benefit of the doubt.
I guess I write this today because I am so thankful for the clarity God has given me in my relationships. I KNOW who sits on the front row and I am totally, 100% comfortable with who is there. And the cool thing is, I sit on their front row too. I am probably the loudest, most gregarious one on their row and they LOVE me for it! So I can rest. I can rest in who I am and rest when I am with them. Oh how I LOVE my friends.
Today I want to honor those incredible women in my life. Some have been in my life for a long time, a few years or maybe a few months. But each of these women God has shown me are in my life for a very specific reason, to trust and to share my heart with. I am so thankful for each of them. Thank you ladies for being in my corner and loving me. Thank you for your encouragement and for uplifting me. I KNOW that you truly desire God's best for me. I love you.
Kelly Ann has been in my life since eighth grade. She is my rock. We talk every day, sometimes several times a day. In a few weeks, we will begin our craft fair journey and decorate our homes for Fall. And the thing about Kelly is, she knows EVERYTHING about me! I think we even kissed some of the same boys in junior high and high school! UGH! I love you Kelly Ann. From passing notes in school to raising our kids, we have made the journey. Who would have thought? Bedford Junior High, L.D. Bell High school and now SpiderMan Birthday parties!
Rebecca lived across the street from me for almost four years. A little over a year ago, we moved. Oh how I miss her! We still get together at least once a month and talk on the phone EVERY SINGLE DAY. She is the FUNNIEST person I have ever met. She is also my biggest fan and tells me I am a star all the time. Burping and farting in our relationship is totally acceptable! That's right, I said farting! She will be in the room when Ezekiel is born so this is a good thing! I lobe you Rae Rae!
Courtney is my recipe queen and my fellow pregnant friend! We are both pregnant with our third! We used to live down the road from each other, then I moved and we met at the mall as much as we could. But now she had to move to Indiana! Again, we talk almost every single day! The first time I met Courtney, I KNEW we would be lifelong friends. No lie! I love you Courtney. You are my "go to" for soooooooooo many things in my life. Plus we have to love each other if Josiah is going to marry Taylor!
Tiffanyis the biggest cheerleader in my life and when someone hurts me, she is my biggest defender. I love how she thinks I am always the right one! She truly carries my burdens and I can't wait to see how God allows our ministry paths to cross. We have the deepest spiritual conversations and then have no problem talking about fashion! I would expect nothing less from a woman that is married to a fashion designer! He has big plans for us Tiffany! I love you so much!
You four gals are on the front row of my life! I can see your smiling faces, I can hear your cheers. You make me love who I am. I love you so much!
Now I have to celebrate my blogging friends that God has strategically brought my way over the last couple of months. You women are amazing!! I just wish you lived in Texas! I have met so many bloggers that I really like and love. There is no way I could list them all so I leave you with these. You must check these blogs out. These gals are precious, God chasing women! The phone calls and emails make my day!
Thank you Lord for all of these women and all the ones I have not mentioned. You have blessed me with amazing friends.