Wednesday, November 30, 2005
Just some thoughts
I am stunned by the fact that Josiah will be turning three years old on January 7th and even more stunned that Ava Beth will be one year old December 22nd. It seems that I have blinked and she has gone from newborn to baby to a chunky little girl in no time! Yes, it makes me want another baby! But, we are going to wait longer than we did the last time. Having two this close in age has been crazy! So worth it though! God has supernaturally given me more energy than I could possibly imagine. I am truly amazed at mothers of twins, even more so by mother's of triplets! WOW! Everyone kept telling me, "After you have two, you will change your mind about wanting a third!" I hated that comment! People now tell me I am "Crazy" for wanting another child. I hate that comment even more!! These two precious children bring me joy beyond measure and there is one thing in my life that I am certain I am good at, being a Mom! That's right, I am a good Mom! Actually, I'm an awesome Mom! I have my days when I want to scream and run away to Target all by myself but I always want to come back and I always adore my greeting from Josiah when I walk in the door. "Mommy, you are home! Mommy's home!!" Then it's followed by him hanging on me saying, "Mommy, I wanna hold you." NOTHING is better than hearing those words! Hearing those words brings confirmation that I am good at what I do. God called me to this life and He has given me the skills I need in order to do it and do it well. When they are teenagers, I TRUST He will give me even more skills!
I have never been a good finisher. Starting something is easy, but finishing is always a challenge for me. God constantly creates roads for me to travel in order to teach me the gift of being steadfast. But two things in life remind me daily about being steadfast, being a wife and being a mom. I can't quit, I don't want to quit. Those are the only things I know that I will finish strong because God created me for it. I can be me and they will still be there. I can be silly and they will laugh. I can be good at something and they will be proud. I can be angry and they will forgive. I can love and they will love me back. I can be Amanda, the real Amanda, and they will always believe in me no matter what.
Jeremy, Josiah and Ava Beth, what a family I have!! I am so blessed to have them and I am so thankful for the safe place they give me. So why would anyone think I am crazy for wanting to add to that?? Who wouldn't?